Second guess

There is something that has been bugging me for some time but that now I really think about it, I am not sure whether I am second guessing too much. Well but it sucks to have to second guess sometimes. That's life, isn't it? (Food for thought)

Anyway I came across this phrase that's says "when you feel like giving up, rmb why you started". I really really hope that the reason is good enough when the time comes the next time round. :)

Another precious cny <3

Short reflection about life

Went along with m's friend on a two days one night road trip to Kukup last weekend and thought a lot about life in general. It was my first time (with the intention) of meeting them (previously saw mi on m's otw home and j in school coincidentally) and this is also my first time traveling to m'sia in a car.

The itinerary was... No itinerary. We bought a watermelon after a random lunch along the way to our accommodation kindly sponsored by e's family. Walked around the k-long with fishes, sat on the boat around, seafood dinner (fresh fish with other simple dishes), went back "home" and was greeted with rambutan (on top of the maybe ten-odd kindly given by a random person who walked to our table during our lunch and gave to us), mangosteen, durian. In addition, we had prawn with flour deep fried pancake. We went to set of a cheaper substitute of fireworks and 天灯 in the outdoor. Next day we went to jb to shop at ksl shopping mall for a while before going to seafood dinner with crab, crayfish, fish, sweet potato leave, tofu.

Lots of htht and what really inspired me is the attitude to succeed in everyone of them. The kind of belief they have and the problems they face. No, not like they grumbled. Each of them have their own goals and targets to achieve and they put in hardwork and never say die attitude. Respect much.

A good brunch to travel with probably because everyone everything also okay.

Am grateful. Life is good this way. :')

未你

The story of rainbow

"Everybody wants happiness and nobody wants pain. But you can't get a rainbow without a little bit of rain."

Reminding myself about this every single day. Now good night Wednesday, tata :)

Another year older

I decided to give myself a break on my birthday from work this year. Bought the tickets to sentosa rws aquarium this year. The funny thing is how I can look at the fishes and think about how nice it would be to eat them, opps!

After much hesitation, decided on fish and co for dinner. Idk whether it is the overall standard or outlet standard that I think the vivo branch's seafood platter isn't as nice as the glass house seafood platter. Anyway this comes from someone who goes to fish and co once or twice a year, not very credible as well. :D

And this year, I feel a mixture of guilt and gratefulness while I have made my loved ones go out of the way for me; my mum cooked a delicious brunch for me (with my fav seafood), sm personally couriered over a birthday card the day before my birthday, my gfs specially went to get the rainbow cake which was out of the way and came after work to surprise me.

I guess I had unknowingly caused inconvenience for them but I'm grateful that I have them all :') thanks for tolerating my nonsense always.

I shall hope I'll be another year wiser :)

New year, new life

Adapting to my life now.

I feel blessed to have nice people in my life. Sometimes I wonder why they are so nice because they really don't have to be.

It is already the end of January, and this is my first post the year. Tired from working and don't really feel like touching my laptop after I reach home. Weekly tennis session has been something to look forward to every week and I really hope that everybody will be committed to setting aside time to meet up. Sweat it all out. But we will have a tennis break because of cny and that reminds me, I need to go back to pack my stuff.

Meeting new people makes me realise that I'm really different from the norm girls. I don't watch shows. I don't shop that often. I don't talk about dressing up. I would love to listen though. I wonder if I am slowly turning into an introvert. HAHAHA. impossible. And sometimes I just smile/laugh when I think of something funny when I walk on the street alone. Kind of scary I think?

Maybe I will grab a book and read during cny. any books to recommend?

and I heard, peak is coming.

未你

Bkk trip in point form

Day 1
Touched down, late dinner/supper at Chinatown

Day 2
Temple
Chatuchak market
Dinner at Platinum Mall (Yummy pretty tiny dessert)

Day 3
Floating market (boat ride) (Yummy mango sticky rice)
Temple (Nice view from the top)
Chinatown for supper (Yummy fish maw soup and bird nest soup)
Night (real) wholesale market down Chinatown (Crazy experience being chased out of the shop for the first time in my life) (and eh, no, not because I bargained for price but because I didn't understand that there was a minimum number of purchase required!)

Day 4
Rest (stayed in the hotel with my cousin to keep my aunt who was sick company)
Platinum Mall (fish maw soup for dinner (again))
Siam Paragon (Phat Thai and yummy Pineapple Rice for supper)

Day 5
Lunch at Siam Paragon (Tom Yum noodle)
Super Last minute 1 hour shopping
Airport

My memory of bkk is shop, eat, walk. little photos. interesting experience.

see the world and realise how small i am.

and be grateful for what I have and who I am. :)

未你

The sad truth

We learn to be more selfish as we grow older, don't we all do?

Learn to protect ourselves in this vicious city jungle, to draw a clear line between you and me. Recent experience of juggling duties of a colleague while she goes on leave reminded me of this complicated world I am in. Thin lines between gossip, back-stabbing and just expressing our views. Ironic when A tells B something, reminding him not to tell D, but B passes it on to C who in turn passes the message on to D. Too bad for A. You have trusted the wrong guy.

Maybe this is the reason why it gets more difficult to make friends while we grow older. Sad right? Not to mention we get more opinionated as we grow older. The "I'm right and You're wrong" mentality. How many of us could truly be confident and at the same time receptive about the ideas of others? I'm learning to be one.

Still looking for a suitable job. Maybe I'm too choosy.
Good luck, please come to me *pray*

未你

Where's my shore?

I dreamt of attending driving lesson, as if it is May 2012 now and I am still in the oh-I-can-slack mode. Then I woke up and realise that I have not accomplished much these few months.

One of the times I feel uneasy about my present.

Time flies, didn't it?

未你

Dream a little dream

And then again, I am feeling low about not getting any answers, While I was hoping for some guidance somehow, from someone up there, I dreamt of going back to school for teachers' day. I met my teacher and somehow seeing him replenished my hope for life.

Thanks.

未你

No matter what

To have seen how some others handled their relationships and still be steadfast in my view for my loved ones, no matter what.


未你

Thank you July

Thank you July for this memory of me passing my driving test.
And showing me the possibility of things.
And reminding me how important it is to maintain a relationship to keep it going.
And how there are still nice people in this world.

And I'm (finally) gonna graduate officially in my graduation ceremony in Aug! :)

未你

Stay or go

Hello world!

I don't know what's there for me out there. What I know is that I have decisions to make.
The next step.


未你

Different perspectives

If we could all see from each other's perspective, there would be less conflict over mis-communication.

This sudden realisation calms me down from being an angry kid to a more logical (or so i think) me. But well, we will still need a lot of patience and understanding to accept each other's viewpoint, I guess. A long way to go. Friends, and our different characters.

Thanks for always being there to sort out my thread of thoughts no matter how bad my tantrum went.

未你

Missing out that something

I'm still pretty much clueless as to what my career path will be. Searching for that opportunity. I guess most people who have just graduated pretty much face the same scenario.

I had a stay home weekend these two days- went to sm's house for the making of rice dumpling followed by Ticket to ride board game. swam and made pasta followed by a stay-at-home-and-sleep afternoon. Becoming a pig. lol.

Back to work tmr!

未你

Need

Because I'll need to learn to take things in my stride; To accept the reality.

Leisure (W. H. Davies)

WHAT is this life if, full of care,

We have no time to stand and stare?—

No time to stand beneath the boughs,
And stare as long as sheep and cows:
No time to see, when woods we pass,
Where squirrels hide their nuts in grass:
No time to see, in broad daylight,
Streams full of stars, like skies at night:
No time to turn at Beauty's glance,
And watch her feet, how they can dance:
No time to wait till her mouth can
Enrich that smile her eyes began?
A poor life this if, full of care,
We have no time to stand and stare.




未你

May day

It was three days of agony at work to realise what I was not be able to achieve. I felt disappointed with myself. And that I had over-estimated myself. Maybe its a good thing that I did not get into crazy work lifestyle in huge companies. But.. disappointment is the word.

Put that aside, I had three post-exams gathering since labour day. Girls singing out (crazily) had never felt so good. Singing is the expression of the soul. I appreciate the simple surprise planned, its the thoughts that count and I'm touched. :) Another one was a walk around Esplanade, one of my fav places in sg, though there's really nothing much to do, was simple dinner and walking around. Recalled something about planning for overseas trip and I agree that an awareness of of the feelings of others is important. and yay I'll be receiving a gel eyeliner as present! let's hope I'll find it easy to use. hehehe. Third gathering: It hit me that the person I missed is the person in my memory and not really you. My very-forgetful brain.. Awkwardness. I should stop trying to imagine that a person is better/worse than he/she is. Take life as it is and move on.

Driving today was awesome! Although I have made enough mistakes today to fail, I felt good about the whole thing. Let's hope it stays this way and wish me luck in getting a good time for driving test! (and it's two months of waiting time. -_- ) Had a whole lot of evil laughter today! HAHAHA. =P

I feel sad when we quarrel about things everytime. However after every argument, I feel glad that I found you who is willing to stick with me to solve the problems together. Thank you and thank fate to have let me meet you. :)

<<random pic i found that i drew. >>

未你

Choices

Life is about making choices that mattered to you. Chat with instructor taught me more than driving skills. And I think i'm evil in some of my remarks. OKAY. Shall not be so evil. And I realised humour is such a beautiful thing. Having empathy is such a nice trait too.

Listening and finding out more about the family of these two instructors made me realised that happy family can be maintained if one put in hardwork. I wonder how my future will be in the future after I get married. And I think men with a family to work hard for are so charming.

Feels weird to have my driving lesson cut down to only one or two per week.


未你

Walking down the Memory Lane

I spent 4 hours of my time last night, not to spend time with friends but to sort out all the cards and letters I have received thus far. The numerous letters that I exchanged with my friends during secondary school days reminded me of the silly teenage days I had. I would be a different me if I wasn't in g e ss.

I learnt so much from all my friends, good or bad, during those days. It is very sweet to read the letters/cards again, knowing that there's always someone there for me, even though I have my irritating side. ewww.. There were also funny quarrel letters that we sent each other to pin-point the unhappiness we had for each other for some. And after reading them, I'm more certain than ever to keep friends who stayed by me through thick and thin.

Thankful much. :') Meaningful sat night.

未你

Random memory of Taiwan trip

Just recalled an incident in Taiwan which I locked and changed my luggage lock (unknowingly) in the hotel room. And of cos I was in a panic to solve the lock because I needed to take something from the luggage bag before we head out for the day. I was fortunate to have sm to logically try the code one by one and he solved it in after around 10min.

This incident made me realized that each of us makes silly mistakes, and we need each other to overcome each other's shortcoming.

We need to learn from each unfortunate accident/incident and become a better person. This should be the conclusion for my last blog post. And the twist of this story is that I did an illogical action by buying the first 4D ticket of my lifetime. Lol. :)

Zoooooooooooo. And I love giraffe and the girls of cos! :)

Okay, when I'm not.

It's not so bad if it is a once-off feeling; It's bad when it is a feeling of remorse, guilt and feeling of failure as if I can never do better and beat my old self. I used to look forward to each session of driving and each served as a motivation for me to carry on with my mundane life. Unfortunately, it has since became a burden that I'm holding on. But I'm not gonna let this continue. Never ever.

I didn't want to write about driving because I was afraid that I'll jinx it somehow, as if that someone above will cast out my name if I were to proclaim that I am learning to drive.

I knew that I was gonna be a havoc on road. And I'm gonna make it my last. last accident.

I'm sorry.

未你